Friday, April 30, 2010

A Mother's Day

My mother passed away 25 yrs ago, and just months after her passing I acquired another mother when I married my hubby. Through the years my mother-in-law and myself have had good times when we were very close, and times when we couldn't seem to get along, no matter how hard we tried. But still in all she was my husband's mother so she was mine as well.

The years rolled on, I matured and mellowed, and she did too. We tolerated each other better and better. We didn't see each other often because she lived in Chicago and we lived in Canada, but we saw each other often enough to find a common ground for the two people we both loved so well... her son, and mine.

Twenty years ago it seemed we had so much time, four years ago, it seemed we had so much time, four months ago we thought we might have some more time.

Today I realized that our time has gone. We are at the end. She is at the end of her time, and after tomorrow we will never again be able to see each other, hold hands, hug, kiss each others cheek.

I look at her and wonder how we got here, and I wonder why we wasted the time we did. My heart hurts for all the lost opportunities where we should have reached out, instead of pulling back.

Growing up is hard, growing old is harder. I wasn't there for her through this process as much as I should have been, or could have been.

I know she knows I love her, but I'm not sure she realizes just how much. She's my Mom, and tomorrow when we embrace for the last time, my heart will be mourning all those missed opportunities.

So hug your Mothers, and Mother-in laws if you still have them close. Don't wait for Mother's Day next week.. do it now.

On a happier note, a very special woman in my life turns 101 today. Happy Birthday Iris. I love you...

1 comment:

  1. Very beautiful and poignant. I enjoy your writing very much.

    Mary Lou