Wednesday, February 15, 2017

THE MAN I CALLED DAD - AND THE CYCLE AGAIN!

THE CYCLE AGAIN

Well here I am again to write, 
The next part of our story;
There are some parts that may be sad,
For that, I'm truly sorry.

For Dale it was a happy time,
As she was about to marry;
It took so long for her to find
Her true love, who was Gary.

But others were not quite as blessed,
Especially our dear Dad.
His loneliness fro our sweet Mom,
It really made him sad.

He tried awhile to live alone,
But soon he took a wife.
He and Norma struggled some
To try and have a life.

Around this time a little boy,
Was born to Wendy and Dean.
Leigh was such a precious child,
He made his Dad's eyes beam.

Our Father was not happy now,
Divorce was not his style;
He sold the house and moved away,
To rest and think awhile.

About his time there seemed to be
A reason for some joy.
Dale and Gary were so proud,
Of little Jonathan, their boy.

The family was so different now,
The closeness fading fast.
Togetherness was just a dream
We held on from the past.

Before I thought we would survive,
But now, I'm not so sure.
We've grown apart in so many ways,
I hope we will endure.

Dale Graumann
1993




Dad really meant it when he said he couldn't live alone, and in my opinion he never gave himself enough time to try and live without my mother.  He remarried in a little over a year after Mom's passing and the marriage only lasted a year.

After his second marriage failed, Dad decided he needed to get away from his life in Winnipeg, so he sold his home and moved to British Columbia to be nearer to two of his sons.

He raced into another relationship and a year later he was married once again.

The next twenty seven years would be a difficult time for Dad and for us, his family.  Our family relationship fell apart drastically.  Personally, my relationship with my Father was strained when we were communicating, and totally absent during the times we didn't communicate.  The few times we were together during this time, seldom were good times.  We became strangers and it seemed easier to avoid each other than to bear the disappointment of our failed relationship.

Dad's third marriage also ended in divorce, but by then so much damage had been done with our relationship with our Father that it was difficult to return back to happier times.

It changed for me, when we moved out to the country.  Shortly after we moved, Dad called me and we talked for a very long time... we even laughed together, and I felt something had changed for the better.  As time went on it was better, so much so, that our conversations were enjoyed and even longed for.

I am thankful I had that almost two years before he passed away to reconnect with the man who had been such a huge part of my life growing up.

Writing this tribute to my Father has helped me in so many ways.  It has connected me to my Father again because of the bond we have always held, through good times and not- so good times - the bond of father and daughter.  Dad wasn't perfect - but then neither am I, and neither is the rest of my family.

I wish we had not wasted so many years on hurt and anger, but I now realize that we had just as many years with love and laughter and that brings me peace and comfort, especially now that he is gone.

Rest in Peace Dad - I will love you forever...








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